My neighbor has a this huge Saint Bernard that usually does its
duty in my side yard where the deposits sun dry into objects similar to frozen
hot dogs, only larger.
I was mowing my lawn one afternoon when I heard this
high-pitched ziiiiiiing as one went flying off the blade, through the chute and
off into space. The mower temporarily stalled from the effort required to
launch this missile. The TV cable running past the front of the house gave a
twang as it apparently was struck by a UFO. Less than a second later I heard
someone on the third hole of the golf course holler, "I never even heard
anybody say 'fore' or I would have ducked," as he groggily rose from the
ground.
Only another split second passed before I heard the tinkle
of glass over toward the bowling alley as the lady in the pink miniskirt
screamed, "Well would you look at that for heaven’s sake, I got a strike
and I never even threw my ball! How do I
score that?"
About that time my little wife ran out the side door. I couldn’t hear what she was saying due to
the restarted running mower, but I could
see her lips going like she was mimicking a chain saw, so I decided I’d better
shut the mower down again or I’d never hear the end of this. She stuttered, “You, you, you’d better come come
quickly into the house. The TV set is
going crazy.”
I asked, “What do you mean?”
She said, “I heard this twang out front, then it jumped
about three feet from the wall, and then jerked back again almost to where it
started.”
I decided to quit mowing for the day.
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