A Fowl Deed

It is my studied opinion that if you go back far enough to find the connection, all people on earth are related.  Such is the case with the good folks in this little tale.  I would need to go back many generations to find my relationship to this family, but cousins they are.

Ray Lawton was born in 1884, son of James Lawton and his wife, the former Sarah Saubert, all in the great state of Wisconsin.  Ray’s mother, Sarah, had a brother Mike Saubert living in close proximity to the Lawton family.  Mike had a couple of sons named Bill and Al Saubert, who, of course, were first cousins to Ray.

It seems on a few isolated occasions around the turn of the twentieth century the cousins, as well as a couple of friends named Carl Smith and Bill Burgduff, had pilfered a few chickens from their neighbors and cousins the Taylor family.  Enjoying a good joke, they had a chicken roast with the results of their ill-gotten gains.  The Taylors, missing four or five chickens every once in a while, placed a lock on their chicken house to preclude fowl theft.  That presented the boys with a double joke opportunity.

James Lawton told the boys to take some of his chickens any time they wanted a chicken roast, but that was no fun at all if he didn’t mind, so they hatched a new plan to lift Taylor’s chickens.  One dark moonless night they crept up to the back of the chicken house carrying a long sturdy pole.  They inserted the pole under a back corner of the chicken coop and pried the entire building up high enough for the smallest boy to crawl under.  With no chicken getting a chance to make a sound, swiftly a supply was passed to the boys on the outside before Al crawled out underneath again.  The coop was then allowed back down onto its wall, as the boys hurried away in the darkness to a fine chicken roast.

The Taylors missed their chickens, but never learned how they had disappeared.  The culprits told the story, and enjoyed a good laugh in the telling, for many years thereafter.

A Little History

At the end of the Revolutionary War there were several factions yet at odds.  Obviously Great Britain and the several Colonies were not at ease with each other.  Another faction to be considered was numerous separate American Native tribes.  The newly separated colonists were not too fond of those Natives that sided with the British.  Also those same newly freed American Revolutionists were a bit antagonistic to the Colonists that had remained loyal to the British King and were known as Loyalists.

Isaac Lawton, born in 1730, was the great great grandson of Thomas Lawton the original immigrant along with his brother George, to Portsmouth, Rhode Island.  During those troubling times Isaac remained loyal to King George III.  After the fighting was over he found it necessary to leave his Rhode Island background, and settled briefly in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania along with other Loyalists.

However King George III decided it was prudent to remove his followers from their current abodes for an environment that was somewhat safer for them.  In 1783 several ship loads were offered a new arrangement whereby they were transported to the sparsely occupied area known as St. John, New Brunswick, Canada, which was yet under British control.  There Isaac lived out his days and died June 4, 1810.

Alone In The World

While enlisted in the U S Navy during the late 1950s I knew a man that was unusually quiet and reserved in demeanor.  After having served four years in the Navy, my acquaintance (For ease of interpretation I’m going to call this man Joe.) had made the trying decision to reenlist for another four years.  However there was a slight problem.  He insisted that he wanted to take 90 days leave (vacation) at the time of his re-signing for the following four years.  At the time Navy regulations stated no one could ever take more than thirty days leave at one time.

A senior officer, with the authority to do so, offered to give him three consecutive 30 day leave periods, but this would have required that he report in twice during the 90 day period.  Joe insisted he wanted to take a 90 day unobstructed leave period.  If he could not do it then he was not going to reenlist.  Messages flew back and forth between our aviation squadron and the Bureau of Naval Personnel in Washington, D C, and after due process the 90 day leave was authorized by someone who had good sense.

There came a time when Joe was scheduled to sign his name, swear his allegiance, take his leave period, and return to the remainder of his four year reenlistment period.  I happened to be in the position of holding on to the special set of leave authorization papers.  Soon all of the reenlistment papers were signed, the proper swearing in ceremony was over, the smiling handshakes had been given and received, the photographers packed up their gear and left, and all that remained was for Joe to pick up his leave papers and go on his wonderful 90 day leave to whatever exotic location he had in mind.

I remained with his papers for a couple of hours, but Joe never came to get them.  I wondered what happened, so with heavy heart I phoned the barracks where Joe lived.  When he came on the line I asked if he didn’t know I held his papers that he could pick up any time he wanted to.  He told me he would be along shortly if I would only hold on to them.

Within a few minutes Joe appeared at my work space.  I handed over his special leave papers, and he tore them up in small pieces.  My lower jaw must have dropped a foot.  I said to Joe, “What are you doing?  That was your leave papers.”

Joe said, “Oh, I never wanted to take leave.  I only wanted to see if the Navy would honor my request for something special.  If they wouldn’t then I didn’t think I belonged here, but now I feel I do belong.  This is My Navy now.”

I said, “But Joe, won’t someone wonder why you’re not coming to visit?”

He said, “There is no one to wonder.  I have no family of any kind.  I never knew who my father was.  My mother is dead, and I have no siblings.  I have no cousins or other known kin of any sort.  I have no place to go.  I’ve never taken any leave since I joined the Navy four years ago, and I don’t want any now.”

I shook his hand and said, “Joe, I consider you my friend if you’re ever alone and need someone to talk to.”

Joe said, “The entire Navy is my family so I’m never alone, but thank you for caring.”

A Rose is a Rose

Leo Lawton

July 12, 2015

From the rose’s POV

            I was told that I developed from a bush that grew somewhere in a land far away, but I do not actually remember this part of my life.  I seem to vaguely recall being inside of a bulb of some sort called a rose hip, but that may be my imagination.  I sort of think my bulb was sliced open by a human who removed me and all of my siblings from our snug home.

            The first thing I’m really sure of was someone trying to drown me.  Someone laid all of us on an old board, and said they were washing away pulp, whatever that is, but as far as I’m concerned there was a lot of water involved, and I was unable to breathe well while under its influence.  I believe it was called waterboarding.  Next I was treated to a warm bath in hydrogen peroxide to help me ward off molds which they said might destroy me.  I suppose this was necessary, and a good thing.  At least I wasn’t freezing like I was in that water torture treatment.

            After we all were removed from the hydrogen peroxide we had a bleached look.  That was different, but next they put us on a damp paper towel and placed us in a refrigerator for several weeks saying it had something to do with simulating winter conditions, whatever that means.

            After this rather chilly experience we were finally brought out into the sunshine again.  I much preferred this, no matter what was going to happen next.  Hanging out in a dark refrigerator is no fun at all.  I began to feel sort of different one day, and looking down I saw I had a tail beginning to grow.  When my human noticed this I was stuck in some dirt with my tail pointing downward.  My tail kept getting longer and spreading out into a root system.  Twice I was moved from my original dirt to ever larger pots.

            Then my forever home human bought me from the nursery where I was brought up.  He was so gentle as he took me for a ride to our new home.  On a beautiful sunny day, the kind I really love, Carl planted me in mother earth at our new home.  The soil was rich, black, and full of good stuff for my future growth.  I grew well all summer, and as fall approached I presented Carl’s mother with two beautiful small roses.  She was awestruck with our beauty.

            Shortly thereafter the air began to cool nights to where it really wasn’t all that comfortable, but I heard my humans talking about something called winter, and remarking how it was supposed to get even colder.  Sure enough, those humans were right.  As the temperature got down to where the dirt was turning solid I decided to go into hibernation.  I fell into a deep sleep.  I hardly felt it when a large animal came along and ate my top off.

            While I slept the days began to lengthen and the temperatures began to moderate slowly day by day, with a few backslides.  I began to awaken from my deep slumber to note that my entire top was missing.  It hurt something awful as the rest of me began to die.  “Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep.”

            Hold on!  I feel a stirring in my roots again.  I’m returning to life.  I feel the sun on my tender shoot that it rising.  My leaves are beginning to sprout again.  Oh my, I’m getting taller again.  I wonder if I’ll return to life as before.  I was so happy in my new home before the winter came.  They have named me Phoenix for some reason known only to them.

Look, look, I’m so happy I’m going to grow another prize for my humans.

Oh my, a young feathered beast decided I looked like a fine place to land, but I was not strong enough yet to hold its weight.  My spine snapped half in two.  Oh, this hurts, but one of my humans is trying to make it better.  He has placed an extra piece of branch along side of my splintered member and is taping it secure.  That removes some of the pressure from my wound.

A Theory Of Life

Leo Lawton

January 6, 2016

If one were to build a machine that would do nothing more than replicate itself, it would be useless.  For most of my life I determined human life had the express purpose of continuing propagation of the species, but if the only purpose of human life is to perpetuate itself, then it has no purpose.  Humans are born, live, die, and it is meaningless.

If there were a reason for humanity it would be to make the world a better place, using superior knowledge to help all creatures. Yet what do humans do with their brains? They use them to design better weapons of death for any and all creatures, including themselves. As efficient as they are at this endeavor, the human population continues to grow at an alarming rate, overwhelming the ability of our planet to support itself.

Advertising, America's Wasteland

The Vast Morass

It’s the old adage, “Be careful what you wish for, you just may get it.”  I was completely satisfied when news began to be presented on the web.  Unlike newspapers it was free, and every bit as good.

Over the past few years that has changed about as radically as possible.

At first the various concerned web sites presented in depth news articles.  Along the sides of the sites were sidebars with advertising, but you didn’t have to go to them if you didn’t want to, just like in the newspapers.  Then the brilliant ad people started adding movement to the ads which made it nearly impossible to ignore them.  At least you didn’t have to put up with that in the newspapers.

Then some savvy ad person got another brilliant idea.  Why not make the web sites more like TV by adding videos.  That way an advertisement video could be added prior to the news segment you wanted to watch, forcing you to watch the ad.  Now approximately half of all articles on the supposed news sites are prone to this.

Then the ad people found out they could trace everyone’s viewing habits.  If you searched for some item, even for a friend, they could inundate you with ads for that item, even though you had no use for it at all.  One thing led to another until the ad folks discovered that a great percentage of the viewers were only studying items of prurient interest, or about celebrities.  Presto, a great percentage of the items placed on so-called news sites are now only those items. 

The news, as such, is disappearing.  There are several wars being fought all over the world, but hardly a word is to be found about them day after day.  No, it is more important that we are spoon fed the latest twerk of Miley Cyrus in place of those mundane things like war and peace.  Of course, in order to see that, we have to be entertained with yet another 30 second video about some object nobody wants, much less you.

The USS Monongahela

Built in Philadelphia, she was launched July 10, 1862 as a barkentine-rigged screw sloop-of-war.  (A barkentine has three masts, the foremast with square rigging, while the main and mizzen masts have fore and aft sails.  The screw was a mechanical means of propulsion.)

She first saw duty as a part of Admiral Farragut’s blockading squadron off Mobile Bay.  On the night of March 14/15, 1863 she and six other ships were ordered to run the Confederate batteries of the Mississippi at Port Hudson.  The first two made it up the river.  Two others lost steam power and drifted back down the river.  Monongahela and Kineo, lashed together, grounded and took a pounding losing 6 men including the Captain, with 21 more wounded.  After working loose they again attempted an upriver run only to lose engine power and drifted back downriver.

On May 27^th, and again on July 7^th she fought two more battles on the Mississippi before being sent to Texas waters for aid in capturing the towns of Brazos Santiago and Brownsville between the 2^nd and 4^th of November.  She then returned for duty off Mobile where she remained on duty until the end of the Civil War.

While in the West Indies on November 18, 1867 an immense tidal wave was created by an earthquake.  The Monongahela happened to be in direct alignment, was raised on a 30’ wave and carried nearly a mile inland on St. Croix Island, where it was set high and dry in an upright position.  It took 4 months to get it back in the water.  It was then towed to New York City, and thence to Portsmouth. Five years later it was finally seaworthy again and rejoined the Atlantic Fleet in 1873.  Six more years of duty found her once more in need of repair so she was decommissioned in 1879.

It was in 1883 that she next appeared with all weaponry removed and used as a supply ship.  Her rigging had been changed from a Barkentine to a Bark, by re-rigging her mainmast as square.  After a short stint off Peru, she rounded South America’s Cape Horn to Portsmouth Navy Yard where she was fitted out as a training ship for the Naval Academy in 1890.  She made yearly Academy cruises through 1897, skipped 1898 due to the war with Spain, and made another in 1899.  The USS Monongahela then moved on to Newport Rhode Island as a training ship for apprentices.  She spent three years in that capacity cruising to Europe and the Caribbean.

 

In 1904 she was detached from that duty and began use as a storeship at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.  On St. Patrick’s Day 1908 the 46-year-old ship was totally destroyed by fire.  Salvaged from the wreck was a 4” gun that, due to the intense heat, had a warped barrel.  It was named “Old Droopy,” and has been on display at Deer Point, Guantanamo Bay Naval Station since then.